Sunday, October 9, 2011

Let that loving light shine through!!!

 A little over two weeks from getting my "football" (aka my spleen) removed, and my recovery is going great. If you didnt look at my very large and quite ugly incision site on my belly you would never even know I had surgery two weeks ago. I was in the hospital week #1 and home relaxing week #2 but I could have honestly been back at work Wednesday of last week. I decided to take the rest of the week and the weekend to just clear my head and continue relaxing. Life has been crazy and I have been nonstop for the past three years that I figured being home for a week with my thoughts and tending to my body cant do anything but help me. I am up and about walking around completely fine. I was even able to hop up on my counter top to reach my yummy treats that are on the very top shelf of my closet. I know I know.....I shouldnt have done  that but I hopped up and down pretty gently. lol

Dont get me wrong...I am still healing and having pain here and there. Its basically the tightness around the incision site and the discomfort with the many staples pulling and grabbing my skin. Since I am most comfortable sleeping on my left side, the side I am very sore and inflamed on, sleep has been pretty uncomfortable.  I stopped taking the pain meds because I was feeling melancholy and having digestion issues. I began taking my cellect again as I was waiting for the nausea to pass. Since that dose of cellect the pain has been minimal and my digestion is back on track.

One would normally think "Oh that stinks that the spleen had to come out" but let me tell you, it was a blessing in disguise. Truly. As I mentioned in previous posts my exhaustion for the past 6 months has been insane. It was at the point that normal activities became a chore and I could literally sleep 24 hours straight if my life allowed me to. Since my football size spleen was removed, I have felt so different....more alert.....raring to go rather than sit around. Despite having a pretty big surgery, I have not had that desire to crawl in bed and sleep the day away like I did for the months previously. 

A little bit about the spleen.....its suppose to be the size of a fist. Mine was the size of a football!!!! What does the good old spleen do? It filters the blood and removes OLD and DAMAGED cells, bacteria, and other debiris. It also creates white blood cells that assist the immune system. What causes a spleen to enlarge? If it is asked to do excessive work in filtering or making blood cells or if it is INVADED with ABNORMAL CELLS or DEPOSITS. What are the side effects of an enlarged spleen? weakness (check), fatigue (check), infection, presses up against the diaphragm causing pain to the left shoulder (check), push toward the stomach causing getting a full feeling quickly (check),  likeliness of spleen rupturing and causing bleeding into  the abdomen (check)  and more likely to become ruptured if injured.

In my sneaky and manipulative ways I received my pathology report. ( The hospitals pathology department indicated that they cant send the report directly to me and they could only send it to my like a good patient I gave my Doctors name but just gave my parents fax number. I know,  Im bad.... but HELLO??!!! Its my body and I have every right to look at my own results. My mama and I went to Fred today to have it checked out.

A nonconventional interpretation of the pathology report from my now missing spleen:

Since the spleen is a filter it contained all the dead cancer cells that my body has been trying to get rid of for the past three years. It showed that the tumor was necrotic aka DEAD. To be exact it read "abundant necrosis present." The DNA of the cells contained markers for melanoma but they were dying off. Any incorrect cells in our body will show up in the blood despite if the cell is dead or not. Fred indicated that it was evident that my enlarged tumor was due to infection and not cancer metastasis. He says this because splitting of an area means that there is an infection because the infection keeps growing and growing in the location its in. On the other hand if it was cancer, considering cancer is cells, they would move around the body and invade the other areas or organs of the body (metastasis). Yes it has been good that I went to Switzerland for biological intense treatment and have been taking cellect but truth of the matter was that all that treatment at once was too much for my body to handle, thus causing the spleen to become overwhelmed, get clogged, and lose its ability to keep up with all the filtering of the dead cells. As a result the infection of all that toxic debris

A non-conventional interpretation of the Ct Scan results

Three areas were of focus....the spleen of course, the liver, and the left lymph nodes under my armpit. The spleen indicated that there was bleeding and as it spoke about the tumor it stated "hypodensity" which Fred says is good news. He explained that hypodensity means low density and non-active which if it was active cancer it would read "hypERdensity." The liver shows a 1.5 cm "spot" which decreased in size from my last test. This area is also noted on the ct scan as "hypodense" which means it is likely a cyst. The final area was the stated that there was lymphadenopathy (infection of the lymph) or metastatic deposits ( metastasis cancer died off and trying to be filtered through the lymph system). Basically my lymph  system was completely clogged and sluggish due to the overwhelming deadness in my spleen, which is a very big part of the lymph system. Since these lymph nodes are palpable I could feel the change and the once large solid mass under my arm is now several small softer lumps. I could actually feel the tumor breaking up and dying off. Fred said now that all the toxicity in my spleen is gone ,the lymph system will improve a great deal. Which means that it will be able to filter out these "dead metastatic deposits." He said exercise will benefit stimulating my lymph system and finally get rid of those annoying lumps under my arm. If thats not motivation to get back into the gym I dont what is!!!

I know this was a lot but basically what it all means is that the tumor in the spleen was dead and was proof of all I have been doing for the past couple years has worked and is killing off this melanoma. The only two areas noted on the scan is the left armpit lymph nodes and my liver which both are not even of concern as they are getting smaller which means that they are dying.  
I feel great, happier and more alive since that very toxic football sized organ was taking out of me. Who would think that having such an invasive and big surgery would be a turning point and shine that much needed light into my world.

Monday evening I go to my surgical oncologist to get these very annoying and horror - movie - like staples out. I will also bring my results and am very curious how he, as a conventional oncologist, will interpret the results. If he agrees that things are looking good Im golden. However even if he disagrees with Fred, which I expect, I know to take it with a grain of salt and remember the mindset of doctors and the large pressure they have to cover their asses.

A special thanks to my Mike, my mother, my father, and my family and friends for supporting my decision to take the "alternative" route. Truly, this  is a path that is very difficult if you are not backed up by those that you love and who you very much respect their opinion. I hate to even think about it but if I did what the conventional docs suggested who knows where I would be today, I dont think here...thats for sure.

PeAcE, LoVe, & ThAnKs,